maybe this lawyering thing isnt for me. i mean, im willing to jeopardize my legal career just because of a minor inconvenience. although i enjoy lawyering...the thing is, i already ruined things for myself. and so far, i can live with it. so why bother? i dont want to continue to endure minor inconveniences for nothing. thats just stupid.

lost my digicam and wallet yesterday

after a long staff meeting, im going to go to class. and tomorrow i start with the assignments discussed in todays meeting. i now have stuff scheduled until february.

one of my big problems is...i dont know how to show my appreciation for things. like effort done to please me. i do appreciate the effort but how to express it...i just dont know.

now i understand why long distance relationships dont work. or why its very difficult. thats weird. this isnt the first time ive been in this situation but somehow things are different. its like im seeing things differently as before.

im not getting much emails in one of my email accounts.

there are a few friends requests in a social networking site that didnt register in its corresponding email account...

im still not feeling well and its been more than a week...

i checked my work email, hoping the printer emailed the quotation already. its december 24. everyone has probably dropped work by now. maybe i should too? nope. i will read some law school stuff instead while waiting for some last minute errands for tonight's preparations.

i would rather be hurt by the truth than be lied to. not that i dont like lies. im a big fat liar myself. i just dont like being lied to. i would rather have the harsh and cruel truth. but maybe its too much to ask for a liar like myself.

have a kitkat damn it!

people have been telling me to take a break but i still have a lot of stuff to do. im tired but for some reason, i really cant stop or i cant drop the stuff im doing. i just cant. its not that im too absorbed with work or im too absorbed with law school stuff or too absorbed with the other stuff im doing. i dont even focus on any of it. i try to do all. jack of all trades, master of none. variety is what keeps me going i guess.

yey! no class later. more time for work

im tired. i want to sleep. but i cant!!!! i need to study after work. just two more weeks. two more weeks. two more weeks then i can start focusing on stuff that i cant attend to like the real property concerns, backing up of files and reformatting the PC, installing softwares, etc. i wonder when i will be in the mood to really rest?

in a few minutes, i will leave the office. the work day is about to end. now comes the acads component of the day. off to the fast food place im in the mood to go to and...study while eating until my brain gives up. then sleep. then wake up and do this again for the next few months. and when my work contract expires, if things go well in school, i will go full time in studying for the next 5 months. then after that, i will find another employment and work full time. do this for the remainder of my life. hopefully, i would be too busy to notice that time has passed me by. thats what this life is all about now.

if the things im doing right now wont kill me eventually, i dont know what will. too much stuff to do. work, school, meetings that arent work and school related, etc. i dont have time for family gatherings and social stuff with friends. eventually, i wont have friends because im too caught up with serious stuff. eventually i wont have a family because they wont be seeing me anymore due to my priorization of the serious stuff.

why is there no coffee delivery service? i would like to have some cappuccino right now but im too lazy to go out. actually, its better that i dont go out. need to control my spending.

tomorrow will be november 30. unlike 2 years ago, tomorrow isnt really a deadline ive set. its more of seriously starting "re-activating" what should have been done this year. now that i think about it, my self six years ago was correct. things are happening the way i thought will happen. if i didnt change myself back in 2004, all these wont be a problem. i shouldnt have listened to others, i knew better. now what i need is the fuel for the fire to burn so i can finally return to my pre-2004 self.

just watched the 10th episode of Glee. some of the elements in the episode really made me uncomfortable.

im hungry

damn it! YM keeps surprising me with its popping and hissing sound

half of the people who are texting me arent in my cellphone's phonebook. what the? why do people keep using different numbers. half of the time i guess who the person im talking to. damn it! tell me who you are so i wont have to go through the trouble of finding out who im talking to.

at the end of the day...i just want to sleep. i just attended a peace agenda workshop from 9am to 6pm. and then i went to a meeting. and then checked my emails.